From Pulling Up to First Steps: How Parents Can Provide the Right Support
First your child pulls themselves up on the sofa. Then they move sideways along the coffee table. And suddenly the question arises: Should we help them walk now - or try to intervene as little as possible?
Many parents feel unsure at this stage. After all, you want to provide a sense of security without taking over every movement. That’s exactly what the first steps are about: not speeding up walking, but creating conditions where a child can try things out for themselves.
It’s not just about whether your child is walking yet
The spectacular moments stick in our minds: standing freely for the first time, taking two steps to the sofa, suddenly walking across the living room. But the much smaller things that come before are often more interesting from a motor development perspective.
Take a moment to notice:
- Can your child pull themselves up independently?
- Can they sit back down in a controlled way?
- Do they move sideways along the furniture?
- Do they move between different pieces of furniture?
- Do they sometimes try letting go with one hand for a moment?
All of these are ways to develop balance, strength, and body control. That’s why comparing your child with others usually isn’t very helpful. A much more interesting question is: What can my child do today that was difficult just a few weeks ago?
When should you help - and when should you simply wait?
This is probably the hardest question at this stage. When a child wobbles, we instinctively want to reach out. Sometimes that’s necessary. But sometimes they just need a little more time to find a solution on their own.
They keep trying calmly.
→ Stay close and give them time.
They want to reach something but can’t get any further.
→ Instead of taking over the movement completely, try making a small change to the surroundings.
They seem tired, overwhelmed, or are in an unsafe situation.
→ Now is a good time to help.
Especially when learning to walk, “helping” doesn’t always mean holding on. Sometimes helping simply means moving a dangerous object out of the way or bringing the next piece of furniture a little closer.
The 5-minute living room check
Before thinking about adding more toys, it’s worth taking a quick look at the surroundings. A few small changes can often make a big difference.
- Is there sturdy furniture your child can pull themselves up on?
- Are the paths short enough to get from one secure support to the next?
- Is there enough clear floor space so sitting down and crawling remain possible at all times?
- Are rugs and small pieces of furniture slip-resistant?
- Are stairs, cables, and easily tipped furniture secured?
Your home doesn’t need to look like a play gym. On the contrary, everyday situations are especially interesting because children can decide for themselves whether to crawl, stand, hold on, or take a break.
Why does every laundry basket suddenly get pushed around?
Many parents know this phase: A chair travels through the kitchen, the laundry basket through the bedroom, and suddenly even a toy box becomes a means of transport.
There’s a fascinating experiment behind it. A child discovers: When I use my body, I can set something in motion. At the same time, they have to coordinate force, direction, resistance, and balance.
Pushing isn’t just “practicing walking.” It’s an experience in its own right, involving movement, force, cause and effect.
If your child can already pull themselves up confidently and move along furniture, a sturdy Montessori baby walker with activity toys can also be an interesting addition. Not as a shortcut to walking independently, but as something your child can push and explore of their own accord.
If you choose a baby walker, make sure it’s not just for the first steps
Here’s something that’s easy to overlook when buying: The phase when a child is genuinely interested in support for pushing is limited. But the toy itself shouldn’t automatically become boring afterward.
So a better question to ask when buying is:
“What will my child do with this walker once they’re confidently walking around the house?”
Here, your child’s interests may matter more than the number of features.
If your child likes sounds, turning things, and little cause-and-effect games, a wooden push walker with a xylophone and activity elements can remain fun for sitting and exploring later on, too.
But if your child starts imitating adults as they screw, repair, and build things, a push walker with an integrated workbench may be a better fit.
Other children particularly enjoy playing with their reflection, moving parts, and little mechanisms. In that case, a push walker with a mirror and busy-board elements can hold their interest longer than a simple push wagon.
Three things matter more than having as many features as possible
The walker should stay firmly in place when your child pulls themselves up and pushes it.
The wheels should not roll faster than the child can move.
Even after those first steps, there should still be more to discover.
In the end, what they need most is time
When it comes to those first steps, there’s surprisingly little that parents need to actively “teach.” What matters much more is providing safe opportunities to try things out and the freedom to go back to crawling on all fours sometimes.
Sometimes your child needs your hand. Sometimes just a sturdy sofa. And sometimes they want to push the same laundry basket through the living room ten times.
Perhaps that is exactly the most helpful attitude at this stage: not asking how we can speed up the next step, but observing which step the child wants to take on their own right now.